While good things can come of lust (passionate relationships, for example), more often than not it gets us into some trouble. Perhaps the money for a new deck is better used elsewhere. Or perhaps storage is an issue. Maybe you have a bunch of decks already that you planned to crack into but haven't yet, and the to-do list just gets longer. Maybe it's something else entirely.
Beyond a steamy love affair that loses it's spark after a while, many of us want to make lasting relationships with each of our decks. It's possible to do this with a great many decks, of course, but thoughtful consideration can help us make good purchasing decisions so that our love for the deck can blossom abundantly.
Now, this post isn't meant to discourage people from buying a lot tarot decks for use or for their collection. This is more of a discussion of how we can deal with our impulses to buy decks so that we don't regret doing so later.
There are a few things we can do to manage our deck lust...
1. Admit You're Lusting
The first thing we must do is recognize that we're lusting after a deck. Acknowledgement is the first step toward controlling our impulses. We can take a step back and really analyze our motivations for falling in love with a deck. We can do a little more research on the deck to decide if it will be right for our unique reading styles, preferred aesthetics, etc.
And this brings us to a related topic...
2. Try the Three-Day Rule
The Three-Day Rule urges us to wait three days before making a decision on something. It's a cooling-off period so that we can take into account a lot of different factors both about the deck and our lifestyles in general. By waiting a few days, we can see if the lust is just a passing fancy or if it's a more profound bond.
We now have the time to look at the broader picture of how the deck will fit into our lives. Sure, a $20 or $30 deck probably doesn't seem like a big deal, but seen another way, that could be a dinner out with the family, money for gas/bills, or a step toward a larger purchase (like a pricier deck... oh dear, this is getting out of hand!).
We also get the chance to take stock of what we already have. We can see if the sexy, new deck is similar to something we already have, or if it "goes with" other decks we have. (Having decks that play well with each other can make for fun multi-deck readings.) Maybe we realize that the aesthetic is completely different -- for better or worse -- from anything else in our arsenal.
The point is, waiting for three days or even a week, if necessary, gives us the time to thoughtfully consider the deck on both the small scale and the large.
3. De-Enable Yourself
This might be hard since everything in our lusty brains is telling us to go ahead with the deck. But if you've decided, for whatever reason, that you're not going to buy decks for a while, then you've got to stick with that decision. Not following your own rules even once makes it harder to follow them again.
To de-enable ourselves, we might consider how much the deck costs. Indie decks, limited-run decks, artisan decks, etc. can all be very expensive. As mentioned earlier, we can think of what we could put that money toward instead if we didn't buy the deck.
If you're attracted to the art style, try reading the card or set of cards that someone has posted. This tests the deck's readability and how well it meshes with your unique reading style. I've found that I like quite a few decks for their art, but when I tried reading with them (based on IG or FB pictures), I get nothing and just stare blankly at the card. But as always, see what works best for you.
Maybe you have quite the tarot/oracle deck collection, but you realized that you have a similar deck already or that you want to deepen your relationship with those decks before engaging with another. Perhaps your to-get-to-know pile of decks is already big enough without adding another one to it right now. (Emphasis on "right now.")
Our IG, FB, and Pinterest feeds are often inundated with gorgeous decks. When this happens, it's hard to convince ourselves not to get a deck because we see it all the time and must have it.
Constantly seeing a luscious deck -- or several decks -- also contributes toward a (real or imagined) sense that everyone else has the it. We feel left out or that to be like so-and-so we need the deck. It could be created by someone you follow and want to support, which is a good thing, but there is a fine line between willing support and a feeling of obligation.
To counteract the lust, it's a good idea to stop checking in on social media for a while. A once-a-day thing for a few minutes to catch a quick glance at what's going on with other people is fine, but spending upwards of an hour scrolling through pages of images doesn't help us resist the urge to get a deck.
And by unplugging from social media, we find ourselves with the happy side-effect of interacting with people on a more personal basis, be it in real life or through private messages/texts.
5. Shop Your Closet -- Er, Collection
This is something that comes up a lot in fashion: shop your closet, or in this case, collection. Take a look at your decks with fresh eyes and see what pops out at you. I know I've mentioned it a few times already, but looking to see what you already have can be a major way to deal with our urge to get a new deck.
We may see that we have similar decks already or decks that we have always wanted to work with but haven't had time for yet.
We also get the opportunity to feel gratitude for what we have. You can reignite your passion for an older deck or direct your passions toward one that you haven't tried yet. You can devote some time to deeply study a deck you have and explore everything it has to offer.
By really looking through our decks, we can better appreciate our collection (no matter or big or small) before adding to it.
I hope these tricks for dealing with deck lust prove to be useful as you thoughtfully expand your tarot/oracle collection.
If you have tried any of these or want to add your own insights/recommendations to the list, definitely feel free to do so in the Comments section.